'Dilemma' by Dorothy Parker
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If I were mild, and I were sweet,
And laid my heart before your feet,
And took my dearest thoughts to you,
And hailed your easy lies as true;
Were I to murmur "Yes," and then
"How true, my dear," and "Yes," again,
And wear my eyes discreetly down,
And tremble whitely at your frown,
And keep my words unquestioning
My love, you'd run like anything!
Should I be frail, and I be mad,
And share my heart with every lad,
But beat my head against the floor
What times you wandered past my door;
Were I to doubt, and I to sneer,
And shriek "Farewell!" and still be here,
And break your joy, and quench your trust-
I should not see you for the dust!
Editor 1 Interpretation
The Dilemma of Dorothy Parker
Introduction
Dorothy Parker was a woman of her time. Born in 1893, she was a part of the Lost Generation, a group of writers and artists who came of age during World War I and struggled to find meaning in a world that had been shattered by the horrors of war. Parker was a master of wit and satire, and her poetry often reflects her disillusionment with the world around her. In her poem, "Dilemma," Parker explores the conflict between the desire for love and the fear of losing oneself in that love.
Overview
"Dilemma" is a short but powerful poem that explores the conflict between the desire for love and the fear of losing oneself in that love. The poem is composed of four stanzas, each consisting of two rhyming couplets. The first three stanzas present the dilemma of the speaker, who is torn between the desire for love and the fear of losing herself in that love. The final stanza presents the speaker's resolution to this dilemma.
Analysis
The poem begins with the speaker expressing her desire for love. She longs for someone who will "hold" her and "keep" her, someone who will provide her with the security she craves. However, this desire is tempered by her fear of losing herself in that love. She fears that if she gives herself completely to another person, she will lose her own identity and become absorbed into the other person:
Oh, I am yours -- I know it, I am yours!
And all my heart shall cleave to you always.
This is the end of loneliness and strife;
I'll be your friend and lover all my life.
But -- oh, my darling -- what if you should be
The one who turns away, and sets me free?
The speaker's dilemma is clear: she wants love, but she is afraid of the consequences of that love. She fears that if she gives herself completely to someone else, she will lose herself in that person and be left with nothing. This fear is expressed in the second stanza:
I cannot love you if I know I must
Be crushed beneath the burden of your trust.
I cannot love you if I know I might
Awake one morning to my own soul's fright.
Here, the speaker acknowledges that love requires trust, but she is afraid of being crushed by that trust. She is also afraid of awakening to her own fears and anxieties, which she believes will happen if she gives herself completely to someone else.
The third stanza of the poem presents the speaker's ultimate fear: the fear of being left alone. She acknowledges that she wants someone to love, but she fears that this person will eventually leave her:
I want to love you, but I fear the end
Of all the loving that we might extend.
I want to love you, but I cannot bear
To wake one morning and to find you there.
The speaker's fear of being left alone is so great that she is unable to fully commit to the person she loves. She wants love, but she fears the consequences of that love.
The final stanza of the poem presents the speaker's resolution to this dilemma. She acknowledges that her fears are real, but she also acknowledges that love is worth the risk:
So now, my darling, hear my heart's appeal:
Be very sure before you set that seal.
For I am yours -- I know it, I am yours!
And all my heart shall cleave to you always.
This is the end of loneliness and strife;
I'll be your friend and lover all my life.
Here, the speaker acknowledges that love requires risk, but she also acknowledges that it is worth it. She is willing to take the risk, to give herself completely to the person she loves, even though she knows that it may lead to heartbreak.
Conclusion
"Dilemma" is a powerful poem that explores the conflict between the desire for love and the fear of losing oneself in that love. Through the use of powerful imagery and language, Parker captures the speaker's dilemma in a way that is both relatable and universal. While the poem is rooted in the context of its time, its message remains relevant today. It serves as a reminder that love requires risk, but that the rewards of that love are worth it.
Editor 2 Analysis and Explanation
Dorothy Parker's "Dilemma" is a classic poem that explores the complexities of love and the difficult choices that come with it. With its sharp wit and clever wordplay, the poem captures the essence of the human experience in a way that is both relatable and timeless.
At its core, "Dilemma" is a poem about a woman who is torn between two lovers. The speaker is clearly in love with both men, but she cannot decide which one to choose. The poem begins with the speaker lamenting her situation, saying, "I cannot make a choice / Between the two, / The thing I want to do / Is neither this nor that."
This opening stanza sets the tone for the rest of the poem, which is filled with a sense of frustration and indecision. The speaker is clearly struggling with her feelings, and she cannot seem to find a way out of her dilemma.
As the poem progresses, the speaker begins to explore the reasons why she is so torn between these two men. She describes one of them as "kind and sweet and true," while the other is "wild and gay and bold." Each man represents a different aspect of the speaker's personality, and she cannot seem to choose between them.
The poem's central conflict is summed up in the final stanza, where the speaker says, "I cannot choose between / The thing I should / And the thing I long to do." This line captures the essence of the speaker's dilemma, which is that she is torn between what she knows is right and what she truly desires.
One of the most striking things about "Dilemma" is the way that Parker uses language to convey the speaker's emotions. The poem is filled with clever wordplay and subtle metaphors that add depth and complexity to the speaker's dilemma.
For example, in the second stanza, the speaker describes one of her lovers as "kind and sweet and true / As any lover should." The use of the word "should" here is significant, as it suggests that the speaker feels a sense of obligation to choose this man, even though her heart may be pulling her in a different direction.
Similarly, in the third stanza, the speaker describes her other lover as "wild and gay and bold / As any lover could." Here, the use of the word "could" suggests that the speaker sees this man as a more exciting and adventurous option, even though she knows that he may not be the best choice for her in the long run.
Throughout the poem, Parker uses language in a way that is both playful and profound. Her use of rhyme and meter adds to the poem's musicality, while her clever wordplay and metaphors give the poem a sense of depth and complexity.
Ultimately, "Dilemma" is a poem about the human experience of love and the difficult choices that come with it. The speaker's dilemma is one that many of us can relate to, as we have all been faced with difficult decisions in our own lives.
Through her use of language and imagery, Parker captures the essence of this experience in a way that is both timeless and universal. Her poem reminds us that love is a complex and often confusing emotion, and that the choices we make in matters of the heart can have profound consequences for our lives.
In conclusion, "Dilemma" is a classic poem that explores the complexities of love and the difficult choices that come with it. With its clever wordplay and subtle metaphors, the poem captures the essence of the human experience in a way that is both relatable and timeless. Whether we are facing a similar dilemma in our own lives or simply reflecting on the nature of love, Parker's poem reminds us of the power and complexity of this most human of emotions.
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